Taking Notes from Miley

By Dillon Meilleur

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Celebrities, performers, and even the President are taking notes from Miley Cyrus. Recently, Miley Cyrus has changed her Disney image to a more grown-up persona. This has launched her to the top of the charts. As a society, we like to reward worthy celebrities like Miley Cyrus with fame, love, and number ones. Miley has worked hard building her image into what it is today: an independent, conservative woman with extremely strong morals. We can’t get enough of her signature move; known as “The Tongue,” it has captured our hearts and licked them. We had a chance to catch up with Robin Thicke and ask him about the MVA performance. He responded, “Yes, I am God’s gift to women.”

A number of celebrities are following in Miley’s conservative footsteps. Former American Idol winner Ruben Studdard recently performed at a charity event.  The revealing outfit Studdard wore was described as extremely disturbing. Throughout the performance Studdard was reportedly making inappropriate hip thrusts. The concert broke out in a riot when Studdard took out a large foam finger. What he planned to do with the finger, we’ll never know.

A similar incident occurred at an Adele concert. It started off as a typical show, as any Adele concert would, but it took a turn for the worse towards the end. Singer/“God’s gift to women,” Robin Thicke, made a surprise appearance. Thicke and Adele proceeded to dance and rub on each other in an offensive way. The rest of the performance was riddled with obscene tongue gestures and inappropriate facial expressions. 

Obama is no longer the beloved president he once was. Since he was elected to office his image has taken some serious blows. He went from being the cool new guy to the class clown. The recent government shut down has forced President Obama to re-evaluate his career and personal life. He was recently spotted smoking cigarettes from the oval office window. During an interview Obama was quoted saying, “I will be reinventing myself, not in a David Bowie type of way, but more of a Carrot Top type of way.” President Obama asked Miley if she could help him change his image and get the public back on his side. He believes Miley is the only one that understands him. She changed her image from old and boring to new, exciting, and in your face. This is what Obama hopes to become. The president also expressed to Miley that he would like to learn how to twerk.  

The public was shocked when they found out that Obama and Miley were BFF. Miley has encouraged the president to be more colourful, in your face, and sometimes just obscene. This is Miley’s patented recipe for success. Read about it in her new book, How to Get Them to Look. The president was recently spotted sporting a pair of leather shorts with the words “Head of State” printed on the back. We look forward to the new Obama almost as much as the next Miley Cyrus song.