Joan of Arc: Patron Saint of Butt-Kicking

 Who the Fab Lady is

Jeanne D’Arc, more commonly known as Joan of Arc, was born during the 100 Years War (which was actually 116 years, but that doesn't sound as cool), at the time when France was losing big time to England, when one day she heard the voices of the angels telling her that she had to go out and save her country. She obeyed, tired of England’s crap and went out and took back the majority of the country, completely winning back the war even after she was burned at the stake by (probably) secretly jealous priests and the English who were poor losers.

The Kick-Ass Things She Did

Well for one she could hear the voice of God, or rather, the voices of her favorite saints, which was still pretty sweet. I mean, imagine if one day you were lying on the grass when Beyoncé or Sailor Moon or whoever your favourite celebrity is told you to mess stuff up. That’s pretty much what happened to Joan.

Her connection with God also helped her perform a whole lot of miracles. Charles the VII, the prince of France who preferred a party to a war-zone any day, heard of Joan coming to demand that she lead the troops of France to victory, set up a test for her authenticity by switching places with a noble. When Joan—who had never even seen this guy before—walked right up into that party and saw through that nonsense like an editor with grammar mistakes.

Another superb moment of awesomeness was when she survived an arrow being shot through her chest. Don’t even get me started.

Oh, and did I mention that she was in her late teens? Let that sink in.

How She Fought the Patriarchy

Remember that this is Medieval Europe that we’re talking about, when women practically lived in the kitchen (the poor things). Not to mention that Europe was still heavy on the Word of God. So not only did Joan’s presence disturb the men of England, but the men of the Church as well.

Especially the men of the church; her own religion became her biggest downfall in the court that led to her end at the stake. Cross-dressing and proclaiming God’s wishes while throwing herself into battle with her fellow Frenchmen somehow equated her to being a heretic and a witch. It’s ironic because she was canonized years later, so joke’s on them.

My childhood heroine deserves all the statues.

Read the rest of her awesome story here.

 


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Erin Chambers

 When she is not on the internet blogging or chatting with buddies, Erin often finds herself consumed by paper, through drawing, reading or doodling and planning out ideas. She also enjoys playing video games, watching old cartoons and throwing sarcastic remarks at her siblings. Her motivation stems from her interests and her friends, and she enjoys turning them into characters and letting them run wild in her fantasy worlds.

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